The Government Shutdown and Trump’s Escalating Wall Gambit | The Daily Show


The wall. It’s not only
one of the lead characters in Game of Thrones. It’s also President Trump’s
most famous campaign promise. Now, according to Trump, the
wall is almost completely built, and America is safer
than ever before. But at the same time,
according to Trump, he also says there is no wall,
and America is in grave danger. And I know those messages
seem contradictory, but remember that the bible
does this all the time. In the Old Testament, the bible
is like, “Don’t eat shrimp!” Then in the New Testament, Jesus
took everyone to Red Lobster. So… Yeah. They’re like,
“Jesus, why are we here?” He’s like, “Because you (bleep)
me good, Judas, that’s why.” Now don’t forget… Yes, Jesus listened to Beyoncé
’cause he new the future. That’s the whole point
of the joke. Now don’t forget,
just a month ago, when Republicans still
controlled all of Congress, Trump couldn’t get funding
for his wall. So with the Democrats
in the House, it’s no surprise that
the situation has escalated. WOMAN: A new year,
a new Congress in Washington, and Trump’s shutdown enters
its third week. 17 days and counting as President Trump refuses to
back down on his budget demand of five billion dollars
for a border wall with Mexico, and the government remains
in partial shutdown. Democrats standing firm that no taxpayer dollars be used
to build a wall. The president repeatedly
promised that Mexico would pay for his unnecessary
and ineffective border wall. NEWSMAN: On Friday,
he suggested the shutdown may last months or even years. If we have to stay out
for a very long period of time, we’re going to do that. Wow. The shutdown
could keep going for years? I bet Trump is just hoping
that if it goes on long enough, America can’t afford
to have another election, and then he can
just keep being president. He’ll be like, “Unfortunately,
there’s not enough money “for an election, folks. “We only have the funds
to print one ballot, “and I get to use it, so my vote
is for Chester Cheetah. “Anyone who wears
sunglasses inside is cool enough to be
my president, folks.” Now, the thing about shutdowns
is that if they end quickly there’s not much harm
that is done, right? But the longer they go on,
the worse the effects are. Think of it like this–
if you leave your cats at home alone for the weekend, they may not love it,
but they’ll be fine. They’ll just, like,
drink toilet water or something. All right? But if you’re gone
for six months, you’re gonna need
some new cats, right? -(laughter)
-And… Because they escape,
and then they leave. (laughter) And 17 days into this shutdown, let’s just say that America’s
cats are starting to stink. NEWSMAN: Tonight, nearly a dozen
departments and agencies have run out of funding. Roughly 25% of the federal
government gone dark. NEWSWOMAN:
Here are those departments– Agriculture, Commerce,
Justice, Homeland Security, Housing and Urban Development,
Interior, State, Transportation, Treasury. NEWSMAN:
Many judges are furloughed, creating a backlog in
the immigration court system. Then there are the farmers,
already under duress from the president’s trade war
with China– the shutdown means they’re not
getting those stimulus payments promised by their government. NEWSWOMAN:
The ripple effects extending to the national parks,
piling up with garbage, even human waste, turning them
into health hazards. NEWSMAN:
Park visitors in some places are “taking care of business,”
shall we say, along pathways or in the woods. That’s right.
The shutdown has gotten so bad that at national parks, American are pooping
on the ground. Who’s the shithole country now? (laughter) (applause, cheering) At the same time, though,
at the same time, though, I thought shitting on the ground is just what you do when you
go camping in the woods. I mean, I don’t know
why this is a problem. I mean, I don’t go camping,
because I’m black, but it’s what
I always assumed people do. And the shutdown
has gotten so bad that the national zoo
in Washington, D.C., has had to close
everything down, including
their beloved Panda Cam. Yeah. Which broke my heart. ‘Cause I love the Panda Cam. I relate to pandas– I, too,
am half black, half white. And I also don’t want
to have kids. So I, uh, decided
that The Daily Show was gonna do something
about the Panda Cam being down, which is why
I’m proud to announce we brought a live panda
to the show! -(cheering, applause)
-No, no. I’m… No, I’m… guys, I’m… I’m just…
I’m just messing with you. We can’t… we can’t afford
to bring a panda here. We don’t have that John Oliver
HBO money, all right? What we do have is some special
effects that are really bad and employees who have to do
whatever I say. So please welcome
the star of our Panda Cam, Michael Kosta, everybody! (cheering, applause) This is humiliating, Trevor. I’m a grown man,
and now you’re… I don’t want to cut you off,
Kosta, but can you just chew on the bamboo
while you speak, please? Fine. What I was saying was
that this is undignified, and if you keep
treating us this way, we won’t be around much longer. (chuckles):
He’s so cute. Look at him. With his little stick.
Thanks, Panda. We’ll check in later. Ah, where were we. Ah, yes,
the government shutdown. Now, the shutdown
is affecting lots of people, but the people
it’s affecting most… most directly are the
government workers themselves. You see,
800,000 federal employees aren’t getting paid right now. And for a lot of them,
it’s really hitting hard. NEWSWOMAN:
Americans are talking about the tough financial challenges
they face on Twitter, using the #shutdownstories. In Wyoming, Ernie Johnson says,
thankfully his auto loan deferred his truck payment
in January, but if he
doesn’t receive back pay, he’ll likely be evicted
February 1. And Sarah Watterson,
who describes herself as a Marine Corps veteran
on Twitter, puts her family’s struggle
into perspective, saying… The president says their pain
is for a higher purpose. The people that won’t get
next week’s pay or the following week’s pay, I think if you ever
really looked at those people, I think they’d say,
“Mr. President, keep going. This is far more important.” Why is Trump fantasizing about what people are saying
about the shutdown instead of just listening to what they’re saying
about the shutdown? Like, he’s fantasizing.
He’s up there like, “I think what they
would be saying is…” “We’re saying we hate it!
We want our money!” “Shh. Be quiet.
I’m trying to imagine “what you would be saying. They would be saying
I’m so handsome…” And now, before you get
totally mad at Trump, remember, he isn’t
the kind of person to just kick people out of work
without offering them any help. No. In fact, his Office
of Personnel Management is giving unpaid government
workers some handy advice on how to cope without cash. The U.S. Office
of Personnel Management has advice
for those federal employees on how to deal with their
precarious financial situations. They make this suggestion. Federal employees
should offer to perform chores in exchange for rent payment. One example
of this sample letter to a landlord
that reads in part… You want people to trade rent
for carpentry? So we’re going back
to the barter system? I mean, I knew Trump was
gonna make America go backwards, but not to the Middle Ages.
I mean… No, because at this rate,
we’re three weeks away from America being
a full-on barter system, right? And as an African,
let me tell you guys, you do not want
the barter system. Yeah. You’re gonna be sitting there
trying to figure out how many goats
an iPhone is worth. Is it one goat?
Is it half a goat? And you ever try
to make change for a goat? -It’s not pretty, folks.
-(laughter) But as dire
as the consequences seem, the shutdown shows no signs
of coming to an end. Yeah. It’s a record right now, and that’s
really depressing news, because… everyone doesn’t know
when it’s gonna end, we don’t know
where it’s gonna go. Which is why I thank God
every day for our Panda Cam. (laughter) Panda, what…
what are you doing? Michael, you’re supposed to be
a real panda, dude. It’s for the people.
A panda wouldn’t be reading -Michelle Obama’s book.
-Why? Are Pandas Republican? No. Michael, just drop the book
and do panda stuff, man. You know, like roll around
on the ground and shit. -I mean, is that what you want?
-(drops book) Huh? Is this
what you want, Trevor? -Yeah! Panda!
-Yeah? Are you not entertained? Huh? -This is dope.
-I can’t do this anymore. Nah. I’m activating
my white privilege. Yeah. No. Not doing it. I’m sorry, you’re…
you’re activating your what? My white privilege, yeah.
That’s right. Sir, you’ve been upgraded
to first class. -Right this way.
-See? See what I mean? There we go. I knew it was a real thing. Michael Kosta, everyone.




Comments
  1. Fuck you Trump. Polosi you’re a huge disappointment. Take Trumps money. Evict that son of a bitch. Trump you are the worst person, president in history. Oh I forgot. You take after your great great uncle Hitler. Soon the 800,000 will be sent to the ovens so he can use their paychecks for the Trump bullshit wall.

  2. Why does ANYONE still mention Trump having said "Mexico will pay for the wall"? We know it was just some dumb shit he said to make his idiot followers think he is Billy Bad Ass. We know he cant force them to do it , so why not get off the stupid go round and find another way to get under his skin that doesn't make us look as stupid as he is!

  3. CARRY ON!!!!!!! KEEP GOING!!!!!!! STARVE AMERICANS AND GET THEM A WALL!!!!! THEY ARE WILLING TO STARVE TO DEATH IF IT WILL GIVE THEM A WALL!!!!!!! KEEP CHARGING FORWARD HUMPTY DUMPTY TRUMP!!!!!!!

  4. So this boondoggle wall wasn't crucial, and immigration wasn't a near-national emergency in the first 2 years of this clown's "presidency," when his party held both houses? It's just NOW crucial? Not when the FIRST "caravan" assembled, mind you, but this second one. This buffoon is either the most irrational, disorganized "leader" we've ever had, or he's just plain crazy. Or maybe he just wants to watch the country burn. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the upcoming Mueller investigation's findings being released. Sorry. Just trying in vain to make sense out of this bs. Of course, I still have yet to understand why anyone thought that Mr. Hamberder should be allowed to be in charge of anything bigger than a lemonade stand…

  5. Impeach him…. A president is only as strong as his followers… See how SA got rid of Zuma… You guys can do the same.. A vote of no confidence. I mean this man has filed for bankruptcy how many times? And was still voted as president…. Why would I trust someone like that and why is he taking the food out kids mouths while feeding his…. No I'm sorry no one deserves to have that much power over someones life

  6. China's polution got so bad they started putting up solar panels everywhere like crazy why can't we learn from china?

  7. I wouldn't be surprised if Trump embezzled and gave the money to Russia in order to harm the U.S.A slowly and secretly👀

    Add in Trump ruining international friendships and relations :p Believe it or not we NEED others. Unless you live a self-sufficient lifestyle, working with and relying on others is what keeps the economy moving. So get it out of your brainwashed, distorted minds that making America great will improve your life. It really won't. Hardwork triumphs everything. Don't go making up excuses. 1 of the reasons why we are in this situation is because of greed, 1 of the 7 deadly sins. #Trumpisthe7deadlysins

  8. There's so much more useful and beneficial stuff one could put in place with the 5 billion Donny-boy is asking for…

  9. It saddens me that assholes are allowed in our parks. ANYONE with an ounce of respect knows you "pack-in, pack-out" and that includes your SHIT if you can't bury it.

  10. If the people don’t stand up to the 🍊🤡 now, he will do this 💩again. Give it up! You’re not getting a friggin WALL!!!

  11. The most dumbest president ever. 😓 Why would he burden the citizen this way… I hope America select another president that actually care (at least) for them….

  12. If no one eventually can get on a plane because no one wants to work at TSA without pay and we have a wall at one of our border doesn't that look more like they want to keep US in?????

  13. I took 49 can goods of food to the power company .for the power bill and they pushed me out the door to with them can goods foods. I was told they want their money

  14. I say we all start growing food on our lawns and creating our own electricity. Let's go in that direction and then let's talk new options. They want to deregulate so let us have some wiggle room too! I'll be off the grid in 2 seconds flat. Why are we moving backwards?

  15. Both my parents are government workers who are currently without pay, and I can PROMISE none of us are saying “Mr. President, keep going.” More like “Mr. President, f**k you.”

  16. So if you live in a housing complex and you have 80 families who are federal employees, would all of them be trading maintenance for rent.? What a stupid idea.

  17. It is unfair to blame our presidents for every misfortune life has given us. It is also unfair not to hold them accountable for damage that they do to our society. When a president is elected, they take an oath to protect and govern our country for the good of our country. This does not mean make everyone happy. That is impossible. But when we see Trump actively damage our society, we must then hold him very much accountable for it. This is not something that we should be debating, since there is one thing in common with Republicans and Democrats: they want what's best for America. So do what's best for America and acknowledge that Trump is doing more harm then good, and we need to stop him.

  18. As someone who used to work and not get paid for a month or so for whatever reason, I feel for the federal employees. Since my last experiences where I ran up credit card debt because I didn’t have money to pay bills and buy food, I’ve lived by this rule: if I don’t get my pay for my work, I don’t work for you anymore. And having my boss advise me on how to survive without money is the most condescending load of horseshit I have ever heard. I hated it when I was a teen, when I was in my 20s, and I hate it even more as a man who is 30.

  19. Alright, the joke about the bible isn't funny at all. The bible is continuous and doesn't contradict itself, so please don't joke about things you don't master because it makes you look stupid

  20. America Leaders have give America Away For FREE .. COME TO AMERICA FOR FREE EVERYTHING GIVE TO YOU NO NEED TO WORK …..FREE …FREE.!!!!!!!! TRUMP 2020…

  21. The wall has nothing to do with the government shutdown. In fact, Trump is force to shutdown those agencies with out budget which is a law passed by Congress. The fiscal year start in October and the Anti Deficiency law drop dead date is December. The Democrats knew they won the house in November.

  22. Yeah, on barter, you gotta be careful with landlords, improve the place too much, not only do you often get stiffed, they'll raise the rent cause the place became nicer.

  23. Let's throw a tantrum like Trump and shut him down!!! Take away all his income, put him in time out ……permanently

  24. TRUMP was going to make America great again but instead he had fucked the americans first and then shoot himself ha ha ha.

  25. Imitially I didn't understand how people could vote Trump in but now I like it. Having this clown in the white house has made for a ton of great entertainment.

  26. I hope everyone here who supports Spanky and his shutdown gets salmonella poisoning from their food that is not being approved for safety by the FDA. And I really hope that you'll have bloody explosive diarrhea and die on your toilet with your soiled pants around your legs because that's what you deserve. 🙂

    Also, it would be a nice way to get the retards out of our genetic pool.

  27. the Pesident 2019 should be personally SUED, for SLAVERY that has been abolished decades ago, 800,000 + workers being forced to work without compensation =(SLAVERY) Illegal in America….
    yet another reason/proof trump is not fit for president…..Impeachment….immediatly…..

  28. Ok Trevor, mocking the messenger Jesus (Peace be upon him) was really unnecessary and disrespectful to me and to all of the believers. You like to joke a lot but some things aren’t for jokes, example mocking the messenger.Don’t joke about religion or make front of people, disrespecting, etc. I’m highly against it. Joking is fine as long as you don’t mock people, racial, religion and it has to be true. You mocking the messenger as a Muslim, I find it very disrespectful! May GOD the almighty guide US All and May He forgive you and US All. (Allahum ameen)

  29. WHO GOING TO BAIL OUT THE GOVERNMENT. ARE REPAY THEM BACK FOR LOST WAGES. PEOPLE WAKE UP. this is the most (SILLIEST) game I ever heard. ALL THE MONEY TAXES THAT GOES THREW THIS GOVERNMENT TO KEEP this AMERICA country a place to live. This is about everyone. poor or rich. who have are don't have.
    Is this the WAR that we are going to start. People (WE) yes WE THE PEOPLE.. Don't be a FOOL. DON'T BE A FOOL. Can the people firer (congress??) People; you guys put these people in those office. And there taking advantage of you people. Especially you other corporations and companies. PEOPLE DON'T LET THEM SAY WERE THE ONE WHO STARTED THE WAR. people; you can sue this congress corporation.

  30. SO question….. why are Americans just throwing trash into an already overflown bin???? Like. Keep your trash and keep the parks clean.

  31. Michael Moore is a little out of touch too. He gets a SAG minimum to appear on the show. When you think of it, that’s almost $100 a minute. But he was all ‘I don’t actually get paid just SAG minimum. $700’ He quickly corrects himself adding it’s a nice chunk of change. I’m just saying the system we have now is so messed up and Michael Moore has done a very good job of highlighting the disparities and I’m not a good enough writer to perfectly enunciate the irony but…you get it; right? Funny world. I don’t know even what to hope for.

  32. Maybe trump just wants america to bow down, get confused, let things set on fire and come to level with 2nd and 3rd world countries. You guys should respect his humbleness to 'F' up his own country just to uphold commun.. *oh god I'm tearing up*.. community!

  33. Imagine you have a house big, a luxurious mansion without any security or like a gate or even doors ofcuz someone will just enter and steal everything. hypocrite democrats

  34. i guess this is what they meant by trickle down economy. Shit and golden showers trickling down from the president to the people

  35. They should get people to trade sex for rent that would work much better, even anal i’m sure landlords will be open to that

  36. Dear god, if the shutdown lasts years I think the US will transform into a singularity and implode the world

  37. made so many solid points and then ruined your credibility with that last dumb joke. remove the entire panda character

  38. This is a perfect illustration of how we all live paycheck to paycheck. We are all mere paychecks away from homelessness. And then there are the people who already experienced dire circumstances and are depending on social services… who are already suffering being mocked and hated for it, by people who only believe myths about the people who end up on social services. It’s great to get a letter saying that your food stamp deposit might not come next month. But hey, you can just barter for food, right?

  39. 1:27. Am I the only one who loves Trevor Noah and is paying attention to the fly ass coat Trump's dumb ass got on

  40. @Trevor, stop blasphemy!! Stop using God's name and cursing in the same sentence! God / Jesus does not use curse words. Cursing does not make your jokes funny. You're funny without using God's name or cursing…. Not cool!

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